Coping with Cancer

There are both physical and psychological effects of cancer.

A cancer diagnosis brings many “what if”? questions, anxiety and depression. Some of this is normal, but can become hard to control. It’s normal to go through a grief process, so it helps to understand the following five stages of grief:

Stage 1: Shock and Denial. A cancer diagnosis leaves you stunned and terrified. You may seek information from friends, the internet and doctors. Beware of internet information – make sure it’s a reliable source and double-check facts with your doctors. Family members also often experience denial.

Stage 2: Anger. Asking “why me” is natural. You may be mad at God, the universe or just plain everybody. You need skills to deal assertively with anger. It’s unhealthy to be overly passive, holding it all in (which causes depression), or aggressively taking it out on others. Don’t get “stuck” in the angerstage. Cancer support groups greatly help to process and release anger.

Stage 3: Bargaining. Many cancer patients find strength and comfort in religious beliefs. You may try to bargain with God, promising Him certain things in exchange for a cure. This is normal thinking, but beware of misleading or unproven “cures” like psychic surgery or herbs – they can’t replace real medicine. It’s ok to pray for miracles, but meanwhile get the best possible medical treatment.

Stage 4: Depression. Some level of depression is normal grief, but for severe symptoms see a psychotherapist, or psychiatrist. We now offer a non-medication MRI type depression treatment called Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS). This FDA-approved treatment has almost no side effects and should help chronic pain. See www.DrKinback.com for TMS information.

Stage 5: Acceptance. This step is difficult for patients, as well as friends and family, but it’s empowering coming to terms with cancer and face it head on. Many new, powerful cancer treatments give reason to hope. Denial delays treatment, but acceptance opens doors.

Written by Kevin M. Kinback, M.D.